


honey, life is just a classroom

by Anonymous



Category: Carmilla (Web Series)
Genre: F/F, Friendship, Gen, Post-Series, Slice of Life
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-20
Updated: 2014-12-20
Packaged: 2018-02-27 22:30:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,724
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2709053
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Potentially world-ending, definitely virgin murdering evil may have been vanquished, but having a front row seat to the show that is a tiny Lois Lane-Nancy Drew hybrid and a deadpan vampire try to navigate the treacherous new reality of dating at Silas University means that there is never a dull moment.</p>
            </blockquote>





	honey, life is just a classroom

**Author's Note:**

  * For [stepquietly](https://archiveofourown.org/users/stepquietly/gifts).



> Title from Taylor Swift's "New Romantics"

Potentially world-ending, definitely virgin murdering evil may have been vanquished, but having a front row seat to the show that is a tiny Lois Lane-Nancy Drew hybrid and a deadpan vampire try to navigate the treacherous new reality of dating at Silas University means that there is never a dull moment 

“But what,” Laura hisses at Lafontaine, on the bleachers of their shared mandatory-for-graduation health class, “does it MEAN?” 

“It _means_ that the choices for date venues in Silas are limited.” 

Lafontaine is sympathetic to Laura’s freakout, really. Your new squeeze takes you to a freaky underground bar that you slowly realize as the evening goes on has no exits for your first date, you're bound to start wondering about hidden messages. Theoretically. But in actuality, after the last few months, they would have thought Laura would be game for anything.

But Lafontaine sees the the panicked-yet-giddy look in Laura’s eyes and knows that the slightly hysterical conversation currently going on has little to do with whatever horrors accompanied escaping from the-club-with-no-exits (“You don’t want to know,” Laura had said, going for haunted and ending up at squirrely, “you really don’t.”)

Ah, young love. 

This is why Lafontaine is dating a ghost in a USB drive. 

“Why did you leave the date choosing up to Carmilla anyway? I mean, this seems a pretty natural result of that choice.”

Laura sighs and turns to face Lafontaine more fully, while still keeping one wary eye on their gym teacher. You have to do that, what with the feelers for arms. 

“Well, she asked what I wanted to do, but every typical idea seemed wrong. Coffee date? Going to the movies? Eeugh. So I shrugged and said “I don’t know, whatever you want to do.” Laura demonstrates this with a shrug and an exaggerated face that Lafontaine is willing to bet is a near perfect recreation of the scene. 

“But then,” Laura says, “that sounded like I wasn’t interested! So then I was like, “Why don’t you surprise me, huh?” Her voice drops two octaves in pitch as she delivers this sweet piece of seduction magic. 

“Hey, you can’t say she didn’t surprise you.”

“I know. I know! And I’m not mad or anything. But I think I might just want the normal college dating thing after all. I mean, terrifying supernatural happenings are something I’ve decided to accept about my educational experience, but I don’t know if I want it to extend to my girlfriend and me.”

Laura has been saying “my girlfriend” a lot lately, even in completely unrelated conversations. Which is why Lafontaine hates to bring up this next point.

“Your girlfriend is one of the undead.” 

“I know,” Laura says, glum but with a determined set to her mouth, “and I’m worried maybe that’s the prob....OH MY GOD.”

That’s the moment where it becomes obvious that the feelers have mandibles. Going places you don’t want to see mandibles go, which pretty decisively puts the conversation on hold.

☦

Now that everything has returned to normal, or this version of normal, Lafontaine realizes they’ve gained new friends. Like duh, obvious statement maybe, but to be fair it could have just been a temporary forged-in-the-fire-of-adversity thing. Finally understanding that it’s not comes about not gradually, but dramatically.

To be specific: Lafontaine waking up to Carmilla Karnstein standing over their bed. 

Lafontaine does not shriek, which they are proud of. Perry would say this is just another worrisome sign of the dangerous effect Silas has on people. 

“Hi, Carmilla. What can I, uh, do for you?” 

“I need your....advice...on Laura...stuff.” Lafontaine can’t see much with the only source of light being the fluorescent red cast by the alarm clock, but from the spasm that passes over Carmilla’s face, asking for advice isn’t something she does often.

Or ever.

“At,” Lafontaine checks the time, “three AM? How did you even get into the building?” After everything, Carmilla had decided to move out of the dorms, considering the ruse was up for good. Lafontaine has no idea where she lives now. 

“It’s my lunch time,” Carmilla says suddenly, and Lafontaine wonders if they should start looking for exits, or possible weapons, but then it registers that Carmilla is making a joke. Hey, progress! They wouldn’t have been able to read that much into Carmilla’s unchangeable tones just a few weeks ago. 

“I’ll do my best. What’s the problem?” Carmilla doesn’t just sit down on the edge of the bed, like Lafontaine expects, but settles cross-legged on the end, half sitting on Lafontaine’s feet.

And proceeds to say nothing for several minutes.

“So…Laura,” Lafontaine prompts. 

“I don’t know how to do any of this,” Carmilla says. It seems to burst out of her, but her voice is low-pitched and raspy, like she doesn’t want to dare admit this too loudly.

“The dating thing? Me neither, really.”

“Then I’m fucked.” This puts some of the wry humor back in Carmilla’s voice. Lafontaine’s sitting up now, and they are both curved toward each other on this bed, in the dark. “I don’t have any other friends.”

“Sorry, dude.”

Carmilla huffs out a laugh. “Don’t be. It’s not really the dating thing anyway. It’s the feelings thing.”

“Ah.” 

“I don’t know how to deal with caring about somebody without the expectation it’s going to be taken away.”

“I can’t help you there,” Lafontaine says, “but I think for Laura, the dating thing? That’s the start. You just have to take it day by day.”

“But what does Laura want. I don’t know if she told you about our first date....” 

“Yeah.”

“I didn’t think Laura would want, like, to just go to dinner. She likes excitement, right? But maybe not.”

Lafontaine says, because they’ve been thinking about it, “I think Laura has this idea of what she’s supposed to want.” Laura would never admit this to herself, but that’s Lafontaine’s diagnosis. It’s one thing to save the world. It’s another to have to admit maybe that, with all it’s death and disaster, was more fulfilling than anything else in your life so far. Or maybe that’s just what Lafontaine has realized.

But rather than approach that right now, they might have a temporary solution. “I think I have an idea,” they say, and is gratified to see Carmilla’s relieved nod, eyes having slowly adjusted to the dark without their realizing it.

☦

“So Carmilla came to ask me for advice.”

“On what?” Laura chirps. They’re on their way to the library to work on an assignment for health class on the warning signs for succubi for the sex ed module.

“You.” Laura stops in her tracks, fiddling with the strap of her bag. “Dating. She seems to think you would find a dinner date boring.”

“What! Where would she get that idea!” Laura sounds genuinely affronted. “So what did you tell her?”

“I,” Lafontaine says, taking Laura’s arm and steering her away from the swarm of Zeta Omega Mu guys stampeding down the path, “am going to host a party. Then you guys can come as a couple. No pressure.” 

“That sounds kind of like there’d be pressure.”

“Hey, there’s no risk of rooms with walls seeping blood in this scheme.”

“Don’t jinx it!” Laura is smiling, excited at the prospect of going to a party as a couple. Lafontaine rocks at this. “Come on. Let’s get cracking on this project.”

☦

Danny Lawrence TA’s a class of Lafontaine’s, and after it’s done one day they start walking back together, Danny towards her car, Lafontaine towards the dorm.

“So,” Danny says tentatively after a few minutes to break an awkward silence, “Laura mentioned a party?” Lafontaine cranes their head to look up at her. She’s biting her lip strangely shy. Laura had told Lafontaine had mentioned that they were maybe on their way to becoming friends, but Lafontaine guesses there is still something else on Danny’s part. But if Laura mentioned the party, Lafontaine guesses it wasn’t unintentional.

“Yeah. You’re totally invited.”

☦

Lafontaine requisitions a study lounge for the party and glares and just glares at any hopeful would be scholars poking their heads around the door.

Perry helps. They are, as it turns out, a great party throwing team. Lafontaine’s only idea had been beer and a bag of Doritos, but Perry added wine coolers and various baked goods. And a homemade banner. Perry’s dorm room was nearly indistinguishable from Lafontaine’s grandmother’s craft nook.

Before everyone had arrived Perry had been fussy, fiddling with everything in sight. Not unusual, but she had kept casting thoughtful glances in Lafontaine’s direction.

Finally, Lafontaine bites the bullet. “Per? You okay?”

“Yes. Yes! I’m excited. It’s just - ” Perry’s smile is tremulous, but genuine “this is new, isn’t it? But good, I think.”

Look - it’s not like Lafontaine didn’t have friends before. In high school, middle school, back to pre-K, yeah, they only had Perry. It had always seemed like the greatest thing ever, to Lafontaine. Other people had to divide their friends into categories based on needs met - school friends, sports team friends, childhood friends, boyfriends, girlfriends. How lucky were Lafontaine and Perry, to have one person for every possible thing life could throw at them?

But you know what they say - college changes things. 

They both had started meeting knew people - Lafontaine joined the alchemy club, Perry got really into the whole hall mother thing. Still. That level of codependency is hard to shake. There was a shallowness to those other friendships. 

But then there was Laura, the wild look in eye and deranged grin and pepper spray in hand, ready to brave any bizarre occurrence or danger for the sake of truth and justice and the pure thrill of it, and Carmilla who shows up at odd hours to pick through Lafontaine’s stuff and eat their food and often almost laugh at their jokes, and Lafontaine finally really gets how it’s also a blessing to have people for every part of yourself. 

Lafontaine smiles back, a bit shaky, but true. “Yeah.”

☦

The party gets underway a little past seven. There’s Carmilla and Laura, Danny and various other Summer Society members, Kirsch and some bros, Lafontaine’s friends from the alchemy club and Perry’s from the German club.

And J.P. of course, hooked up to Lafontaine’s laptop and helpfully DJing. 

It’s good.


End file.
